Saturday, February 11, 2006

Never Work Alone

Who would've guessed that a renowned networking guru with a national presence and a conflict resolution expert (yours truly) would have so much in common? You never know who shares your views and goals unless you reach out.

Recently, Keith Ferrazzi, author of Never Eat Alone and networking expert for Inc. Magazine, invited me to join him for a chat before his presentation to Yale alum in Boston (Keith says he bleeds blue!) to talk about our views on connecting.

Turns out we share many concepts and ideas about our respective work. Things like transparency, authenticity and fragility.

Take fragility for example. We each believe that the notion of fragility can motivate behavior changes, but that's where the similarity ends.

Keith believes that when a person- let's call him Bill- has to deliver a message he believes is awkward or difficult, Bill will try to protect the other person. Bill believes that people are fragile and need protection. Bill will adjust his behavior to avoid hurting the other person.

I also believe fragility drives behavior. I think that Bill changes his behavior because he believes relationships are fragile. Bill changes his behavior to avoid hurting the relationship or his self interest (he wants to keep the relationship)

Either way, this is the start of a great friendship. Keith and I are both looking for ways to bring our viewpoints in an integrated way to the people we serve. Who do you know that seems like a kindred spirit that you can connect with?
(Don't be shy about it. I worried about lil ol' me meeting Keith, the big-shot Networking guru for Inc. magazine until I spoke with him. He's a thoroughly warm, approachable guy who shares my passions. I bet it'll be the same for you.)

I'd love to hear what you think of this, so drop me at note at Have a peek at Keith's website, too


At 7:21 AM, Anonymous Erin Ferraguto said...

Very interesting Dina. I do agree with you that "Bill" would adjust his behavior because relationships are fragile or because he's protecting a self interest because if he didn't care about the relationship or the self interest then it probably wouldn't be difficult to delivery the news or message. That would be a good thing though because people should still care, be respectful and approach difficult issues in a sensitive manner but not sacrifice their values or ethics in the process and still approach the situation assertively.


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